Kolokoy Household: Year-End Special

Barely two months after its “launch”, I still get good feedbacks regarding my Kolokoy Household posts. So in my attempt to end this year with a bang and to make our last Monday of 2012 fun, here’s the third episode of Kolokoy Household! :)


SWERTE

Out of the blue, my mom suddenly remembered about an ex-boyfriend.

Mama: Hay naku, buti na lang hindi ‘yun ang nakatuluyan ni Jerellt. Ayaw ko ‘dun e.
Me: Ewan ko sa’yo! E kay Boyet din naman ayaw mo.
Mama: Oo! Ayaw ko 'yan. Napilitan na lang ako sa tagal ninyo mag-on e.
Boyet (whispering): Ang yabang ni Mama. Hindi niya alam, napilitan lang din naman ako sa kanya!
Mama: Ano daw ‘yun?
Boyet: Wala po, Ma!


DISHWASHER

Some relatives went over to the house on two consecutive weekends. Boyet and I were in-charge in washing the dishes on the first weekend. But on the following week when it was already the turn of Abes, our relatives decided not to have dinner at our house.

Me: Ang dugas naman! Ang dami naming hinugasan last week. Hindi pala sila kakain dito. Akala ko pa naman makakaganti na ako kay Abes ngayon.
Abes: Ayan kasi. Dapat kasi, tinatanggal natin sa mga puso natin ang paghihiganti.
Me: ULUL!


IPIS

Rai, Boyet’s two-year old niece followed him when he went up to the rooftop. Since Boyet was having a hard time persuading Rai not to go to the rooftop, he tried to scare the kid.

Boyet: Baba ka na. Huwag ka na dito.
Rai: Yaw ko!
Boyet: Ay, isusumbong kita kay Mama mo. Baba ka na dali.
Rai: Eeeeeeehhhhhh!!! 
Boyet: Hala! Hala! Bahala ka! May ipis dito!
Rai: Diyan, may unggoy!

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Napakamot na lang kami ng ulo pareho ni Boyet! :p


BUYOY

I was trying to have a candid conversation with Rai. At two years old, he still has a hard time talking straight.

Me: Sino siya? (pointing to his older brother)
Rai: Kuya… Itoy. (Kuya Icoy)
Me: E siya? (pointing to his older sister)
Rai: Ate Endang.
Me: E ako, sino ako.
Rai: Ewan to. (Ewan ko.)
Ate Ai (Rai’s mom): Kilala ka nya. Hiya lang ‘yan kasi di nya masabi TITA JERELLT. May R na kasi, may T pa.

The following day while I was taking a bath, I heard someone banging the door.

Rai: TITA JEYEY! TITA JEYEY!!! NAIIHI NA ATO!
Boyet: O di ba, kilala ka nga nya?!


SRI LANKA 

Boyet: Knock knock!
Me: …
Boyet: Knock knock!
Me: Ok, fine! Who’s there?
Boyet: Sri Lanka
Me: Sri Lanka, who?!
Boyet: Ladies and gentlemen… Mr. Freddie Aguilar… Nang SRI LANKA sa mundong ito, laking tuwa ng magulang mo!
Me: … … … 


NEW ZEALAND 

One week after his SRI LANKA joke...

Me: Knock knock!
Boyet: Who’s there?
Me: New Zealand
Boyet: New Zealand, who?!
Me: NEW ZEALAND ka sa mundong ito, laking tuwa ng magulang mo!
Boyet: Anak ka ng!!!


PERFECT CATCH 

Boyet: Bakit kaya ganun, Baby?
Me: Ano ‘yun?
Boyet: Bakit kaya ang swerte swerte mo sa’kin? Ang bait bait ko. Ang haba ng pasensya ko. Napakasipag ko. Kita mo naman, tinutulungan kita maghugas ng pinggan, maglaba at maglinis ng bahay!
Me: Ahhhh! Ganoon talaga. Hindi ka kasi GWAPO e! Kaya kailangan mong ma-compensate sa ibang bagay!
Boyet: Putakte naman! Hindi talaga ako mananalo sa’yo!
Me: HIHIHIHIHI!!!